This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: November 6, 2020
October 30
Between Brett Favre and Eric Bolling, Trump has the unwanted dick pic vote locked.
— JeremyNewberger (@jeremynewberger) October 30, 2020
Oh yeah, that's some mediocre coke. https://t.co/MhZHSnXtbz
— I Have Become Pennsylvania (@TonyAtamanuik) October 30, 2020
This morning I saw my cat out in the yard hunched over something, yowling his head off and I went out and saw he had this thing cornered and I couldn't quite tell what it had been so I called animal control and they came over and trapped it in this big like bucket type thing 1/
— Wendy Molyneux (@WendyMolyneux) October 31, 2020
October 31
he wears a mask https://t.co/hy7UAMYF4Z
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) November 1, 2020
Here it is. The definitive list of Trump's 100 Most Tremendous Scandals. pic.twitter.com/6XTOIaInGs
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) October 31, 2020
https://t.co/dEFzYGFoLc pic.twitter.com/EMvgadzmh8
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) October 31, 2020
Imagine dying because you wanted to hear once last rant about Hillary's emails.
— Schooley (@Rschooley) October 31, 2020
November 1
Noah's wife: the ark is falling apart
— Jon (@ArfMeasures) November 1, 2020
Noah: glue might work, I have an idea
Horse: it's weird he brought 3 of us
— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) November 2, 2020
A Trump rally is the perfect place to shop for the children in your life. pic.twitter.com/rqdek5byv5
— The Good Liars (@TheGoodLiars) November 1, 2020
November 2
Ultimate election result: "The Sufjan" pic.twitter.com/ZjLjPJ7A6r
— pixelatedboat aka "mr tweets" (@pixelatedboat) November 3, 2020
If Biden doesn't win, 538 had better be a Spirit Halloween next year.
— Daniel Kibblesmith (@kibblesmith) November 3, 2020
Not going to live-check anything else from Trump's ongoing Michigan rally, but just want to let you know he still has not been named Michigan's Man of the Year.
— Daniel Dale (@ddale8) November 2, 2020
November 3
Tonight's the night we see if hockey legend Bobby Orr still holds his once unshakeable influence over American politics.
— Michael A. Balazo (@mbalazo) November 3, 2020
we're all on the same page that the past four years are the Real America not just a fluke right
— giabuchi lastrassi (@jaboukie) November 4, 2020
I don't get it Biden did everything right. He didn't campaign, he had Alzheimer's, he made the election all about Trump and didn't offer a positive case for himself, he took corporate money, he condemned looting and supported fracking. What happened?
— David Specturkey (@spectordeforce) November 4, 2020
God, I love the first night of Election Week. So festive. We broke out the traditional stress ball garlands and I'm going to carve the Xanax in about 20 minutes.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 4, 2020
other countries really watching america right now and hoping we get it together like we're bubbles from the wire
— Desus Nice (@desusnice) November 4, 2020
A party that doesn't win the White House in a landslide after the incumbent killed 230,000 people should engage in some self-reflection, I think
— Kate Aronoff (@KateAronoff) November 4, 2020
This. Is. Amazing. https://t.co/2Ej2pxxL9W
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) November 3, 2020
if trump loses can no one tweet taunt him please cuz he still has the nuclear codes for 3 more months thanks
— JEN KIRKMAN 👩🏻💻 (@JenKirkman) November 3, 2020
November 4
startin to think the pod didn't save anything
— jamieloftus 🏂 (@jamieloftusHELP) November 4, 2020
This is Brett Kavanaugh if his parents couldn't afford prep school pic.twitter.com/zxvAXZ4bvW
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) November 5, 2020
CNN the last 24 hours pic.twitter.com/a0XJO7de0w
— Michael Kosta (@michaelkosta) November 5, 2020
Biden could still pull off the historical sweep of every state Steve Miller has been to in Keep On Rockin Me Baby
— Jason Isbell (@JasonIsbell) November 4, 2020
I assume this be for the 230,000 Americans who died of Covid? https://t.co/34z8jeQxAR
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) November 5, 2020
Pick a struggle. https://t.co/bkXJCKQUYc
— Gabrielle Union (@itsgabrielleu) November 5, 2020
BREAKING: Nation anxiously waits to see if man leading by 3.4 MILLION VOTES will become the next President.
— Fifty Shades of Whey (@davenewworld_2) November 5, 2020
Very responsible of the Democrats to rig the election, but not take the Senate or a supermajority in the House
— Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein) November 5, 2020
November 5
When all the theatre kids are in the other party https://t.co/jrUf4ACJjx
— Jill Twiss (@jilltwiss) November 5, 2020
NEW: I'm told that President Trump can't get his messaging straight on counting the votes because he doesn't understand what "stop the count" means. On a call this morning, an adviser had to explain to him that if they stopped counting votes right now, he would lose the election.
— Olivia Nuzzi (@Olivianuzzi) November 6, 2020
Let me get this straight, lying liar who consistently has said bigoted things and has a long history of racism (hello birtherism!) lies about doing a thing for Black people that he'll never do because he's a chronic liar and people think he's lying? https://t.co/fN7MCxFaUn
— Soledad O'Brien (@soledadobrien) November 5, 2020
Didn't want this to get lost today https://t.co/1bJ8qcA11m
— Gabe Delahaye (@gabedelahaye) November 5, 2020
Haha that's right, motherfucker! You kill 230,000 people and you get what's coming to you: you barely lose an election
— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) November 5, 2020
When you ask your partner to name all the people they've been with before you and they start answering honestly https://t.co/n053E3uVLN
— Jhanelle (@JhanelleDennis) November 5, 2020
Dear White House Movers:
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) November 6, 2020
Ask for the money up front. pic.twitter.com/TERrL1yDvL
.@realdonaldtrump please DM, we have FRESH evidence from West Philadelphia that a couple of guys are up to no good, starting to make trouble in the neighborhood
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) November 6, 2020
because we know how stupid it fuckin looks lmao https://t.co/12lmXfV2aq
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) November 5, 2020
The guy the GOP is sending to war in Philly vs. the actual Lt. Governor of Pennsylvania pic.twitter.com/MuCjLn8cWL
— Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein) November 5, 2020
HE FELT THE PRESSURE AND TRIED TO DAP ME UP LOL pic.twitter.com/pcBEVheHt8
— pro bowl mvp (@rynej__) November 5, 2020