This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: September 25, 2020
September 18
... no, I mustn't. https://t.co/aqIhdj0lGF
— Jeremy Woodcock (@jwPencilAndPad) September 18, 2020
when is the last time someone bad died
— ceeks (@70Ceeks) September 19, 2020
Imagine thinking Republicans can be shamed by... hypocrisy.
— Naomi Klein (@NaomiAKlein) September 19, 2020
Jon Stewart accidentally convinced a whole generation of liberals that playing videos of Republicans contradicting themselves is enough
— Gianmarco Soresi (@GianmarcoSoresi) September 19, 2020
Choose your fighter pic.twitter.com/xIcXVPx834
— Ken Klippenstein (@kenklippenstein) September 19, 2020
September 19
i was in a sex store today and this girl walked in, looked at me and went "hello, where are the strap ons?" like girl i don't work here but aisle 12
— ABOLISH THE POLICE (@hairyfairie) September 20, 2020
Trying a horrible experiment...
— Tony "Abolish (Pol)ICE" Arcieri 🦀 (@bascule) September 19, 2020
Which will the Twitter algorithm pick: Mitch McConnell or Barack Obama? pic.twitter.com/bR1GRyCkia
Chuck Grassley is third in the line of succession for the presidency pic.twitter.com/EUt5gy2Z64
— Tim Hogan (@timjhogan) September 19, 2020
I'm Joe Biden and I approve this message. pic.twitter.com/TuRZXPE5xK
— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) September 20, 2020
what does a&w even stand for?? ... amburgers & woot beer?
— ??? (@elusive2001) September 19, 2020
SCARFACE: Say hello to my little friend!
— Chris Locke (@chrislockeworld) September 20, 2020
SCARFACE'S MACHINE GUN: Hello everyone I look forward to working with you
September 20
— sina rawayama (@sina_rawayama) September 20, 2020
absolutely losing my mind over this pic.twitter.com/LM0vaPvnVM
— communism is good (@weirdcities) September 20, 2020
The great David @Letterman hitchhikes to the #Emmys! pic.twitter.com/nkvp11TyvB
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) September 21, 2020
Do ACLs only exist so they can tear? You never hear about an ACL doing anything good. Bitchass ligament.
— C.J. Toledano (@CJToledano) September 20, 2020
September 21
https://t.co/oqsf6rtAU6 • https://t.co/ztznLId5fl pic.twitter.com/2J2iMWGVc2
— demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon) September 21, 2020
it's time pic.twitter.com/c6DqnpxZkL
— paul rudd dancing to (@pauldancing) September 21, 2020
I hate what Pinterest did to google image search— Kyle Chayka (@chaykak) September 21, 2020
September 22
My grandma was telling me about a non cis friend of hers and couldn't remember their preferred terminology. So she called them gender mysterious.
— Wendy 🍒 (@cherriesandgin) September 23, 2020
white ppl, do NOT listen to him https://t.co/19O4gAnaCq
— florida man (@arizonablueme) September 22, 2020
pet rent is the stupidest concept i've ever heard of how do you expect my cat to pay $50 a month she is unemployed
— kayla ♡ (@baz00per) September 22, 2020
2endaya is meechee https://t.co/YCRTWMwDhJ
— Gabriel Gundacker (@gabegundacker) September 22, 2020
September 23
He stinks as a musician https://t.co/w8FXuyw6Sn
— David Crosby (@thedavidcrosby) September 23, 2020
Poll: I'd be perfectly fine with living in a dictatorship
— Emo Philips (@EmoPhilips) September 24, 2020
In "Uptown Funk" Bruno Mars tells Julio, who we can assume is his driver, to get the "stretch" (slang for a limousine). In "That's What I Like," Mars asks Julio to "serve that scampi" indicating Julio is also Bruno's chef. Who is this renaissance man?
— jon drake (@DrakeGatsby) September 23, 2020
September 24
Well, the Constitution had a good run.
— Lawrence O'Donnell (@Lawrence) September 24, 2020
Bill Murray receives a legal demand from the Doobie Brothers. And it's everything you'd want it to be... pic.twitter.com/R1L99yZSBj
— Eriq Gardner (@eriqgardner) September 24, 2020
My worse nightmare... pic.twitter.com/zxlLU1rYe7
— The Slum Brothers (@SlumBros_2020) September 24, 2020
um, okay? https://t.co/W4Gf9k5S9T
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) September 25, 2020